I’m stuck at a car wash with a creepy old man asking if I want to have an affair.
I’m so sorry for offending you with my Jew jokes and my existence. I’m ganna go cry now.
Actually, I don’t give a fuck. Not even a half. Or a fourth. Or an eighth. I just dont care.
Anyway, I have purchased a domain and will soon be busy with that.
My period blood is the secret ingredient to the sauce.
Mom I kno I’m gay but I don’t want to talk about makeup.
so won tyme, der wuz dis gurl.
she wuz so pritty.
I wuz in lve wit hur n I thnk she luvd me
she wuz sittin in da hozpitalz bc she had a tumor
I tld her ‘iloveu frever’
she sed “whateva” n I cri
so I keel myslf. grl dies frm tumor.
we see ech otha in brtny sprs’ uterus whch is actully heven
she say “I ment 2 say ‘5eva’ I love u 5eva;
n den I juz cri so hardd